


28 Minutes Later

by littledust



Category: Gossip Girl
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-18
Updated: 2010-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-17 21:45:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/181481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littledust/pseuds/littledust
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When zombies attack, it's Serena to the rescue, and Blair isn't sure how she feels about that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	28 Minutes Later

**Author's Note:**

> This bit of silliness has been sitting in Google Docs forever. I decided to just post it already!

When the zombies attacked, it was actually an improvement on Blair Waldorf's evening.

Up until that point, she'd been scanning the crowd of old grunge rocker wannabes for Serena, who was here somewhere trying to make up with her bad life decision. Or at least that was the word according to Gossip Girl, but since Serena hadn't said _anything_ about this to Blair and was not exactly a huge Lincoln Hawk fan, Blair could only conclude that some rumor-mongering anonymous blogger knew more about her best friend than she did. Or at least more about what Serena wanted right now.

The flashing lights caught a glint of long blond hair, and there was Serena, standing in the crowd with her usual effortless belonging. She'd dressed down for the concert in jeans and a simple top. Even peering around for Humphrey Spawn the First, even in an outfit that scarcely deserved the name, even surrounded by the unwashed masses, she looked amazing.

Blair might have permitted herself a sigh if she weren't so furious.

It was then that a particularly unwashed member of the masses tried to bite her.

Blair shrieked, which got mostly lost in the noise, and then hit the guy on the head with her purse. She wasn't prepared for the way his head caved in on impact with a noise like hitting a melon with a golf club. "Oh my effing God, I just killed a man!" she cried, then slapped a hand over her mouth in horror. So what if no one would miss him? She'd just taken a life, killed a living, breathing...

Then some other members of the crowd dragged his corpse upright and began to eat him.

Two things happened simultaneously: Blair gagging at the sheer grossness of it all, and the music coming to a confused halt. "Okay, everybody, try not to panic--" the lead singer said into the mic, before a groupie crawled up on stage and he had to hit her with his guitar. The groupie had skin tinged gray-green, and okay, maybe Blair should have noticed earlier that some people in the crowd were rotting. Grunge fans, hello? Like that was surprising.

Screams sounded from all around and Blair fought the urge to panic with them. "Just find Serena and then find a door," she chanted over and over, smacking away grasping hands. True to old horror movies, the zombies moved slowly, making peculiar moaning noises that she refused to interpret as _braaaiiiiiins_. They weren't terribly hard to fight off, but they were annoying, and her purse was now covered in zombie goo. And great, she'd just ignored every tip to survive a horror movie and let herself get backed into a corner.

"If you turn me into one of you, you'll be sorry when I'm queen of the zombies!" she yelled, swinging her purse and knocking aside two zombies, which still left another two who were far too close.

Right at that moment, Blair heard a familiar voice raised in some kind of war cry, and then the two remaining zombies each took a stiletto to the eye. "Zombies bite," quipped Serena, posing like an action hero, although the look was somewhat ruined by the goopy heel in each hand.

Blair kind of hated her at that moment, but survival instinct took over. She grabbed Serena by the wrist and made for the exit as fast as possible, ignoring whatever Serena was saying about Bland Humphrey, the person here who most deserved to get devoured by zombies. It might even be an improvement on his personality.

It wasn't until she had Serena safely ensconced in the back of a cab that she realized Serena was crying. "Oh, S," Blair sighed, slinging an arm around Serena. "I'm sure he got out okay." With the other hand, she began a surreptitious dig through her purse, intending to text Gossip Girl an "eyewitness" account of the Humphrey family escaping, but her phone beeped before she could text a thing. A message popped up on screen:

 _This just in: seems like you can't always go downtown. After a small outbreak of zombies--the kind that want brains, unlike New Yorkers--socialites S and B were seen fleeing the scene, eastward bound. Spotted headed in the opposite direction: Lonely Boy and Little J. Seems like there's no reunion in store for East Side and West Side, but tonight proves that stranger things have happened. xoxo, Gossip Girl_

"I guess Gossip Girl really does know everything," Blair said after a moment, then handed Serena a handkerchief. Wiping your face on the back of your hand was so inelegant. Speaking of, there were still zombie remains on Serena's shoes, and the cab was starting to smell just delightful. Blair eyed the heels-cum-weapons and waged a silent inner debate on whether Christian Louboutins were worth saving, if it were even possible. Then again, smell aside, they might need them to kill more zombies...

Blair shivered. "S, what if it's the apocalypse?"

Serena, recovered from her tears and looking annoyingly perfect still, flashed a smile that lit up the cab and did funny things to Blair's stomach. "Gossip Girl is still blogging, B. Until we get a blast saying, _'Braaaaiiiiiiins, xoxo,'_ New York City is just fine." Serena looked down at her, still smiling, but now with her lower lip caught between her teeth.

The cab screeched to a halt. Blair vowed revenge on all public transportation everywhere.

When Blair unlocked the door, she handed Dorota her coat and put her on Google reconnaissance. "Zombies, Miss Blair?" she asked helplessly, but retrieved a laptop anyway. Serena was on the phone with Eric, and Blair debated calling her mother. It was early morning in London, and it seemed like nowhere else had been affected. Blair frowned and tried to remember the details of the one zombie movie Nate had begged her to see with him. Didn't outbreaks always get bigger, though?

After a few minutes of typing, Dorota, expression more and more disbelieving, reported, "Google is saying that all the zombies have been destroyed in the club. They are not tough like movie zombies; no one was bitten. Miss Blair, there are really zombies?"

"It's New York City. _Everything_ is here," Blair replied, mostly out of reflex. She let out the breath she'd been holding since the club (well, maybe more like since she'd smelled the shoes in the taxi cab), and let her shoulders slump in release. Blair always had perfect posture in tense situations; it maintained appearances.

Serena stuck her phone in her pocket, smiling again. "Sounds like everything's okay."

"Everything's okay," Blair repeated, feeling an answering smile spread across her face. There was no zombie apocalypse, no one was hurt, and Serena was here, alive, after saving her life. They were both alive. "Everything's okay!" Blair said again, this time with a laugh, and kissed Serena, who promptly caught Blair up in her arms and dipped her backwards.

Having that much style should be outlawed.

When the (truly spectacular) kiss ended, Blair was still in Serena's arms, both of them breathless and laughing and, yes, still alive. "I missed seeing you happy," Blair confessed.

"I missed seeing you, period," Serena said softly, and kissed her forehead.

Though Blair had imagined herself as the star of countless movies, she'd never in her life imagined herself as the heroine of a zombie flick. Maybe it was time to start branching out.


End file.
